This day three years ago I went for it. A girl who did not really didn’t notice me for the whole month and a half of our exhaustive knowledge of each other. I had made attempts, some very lame attempts, at getting to know her but only in that uncommitted way that is much like a middle schooler hitting a girl whom he likes.
Nothing worked. I tried several ploys that I found out later only backfired. It was all or nothing. I even had a verse in preparation for my expected rejection. “The steps of a man are established by the Lord, when he delights in his way; though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the Lord upholds his hand.” (Ps. 37:23, 24) I knew I could fall; I was just hoping I wouldn’t be cast headlong. Sounds awful.
And so with little to no encouragement; with almost no hope whatsoever I put myself out there. By that time it was win-win. I wouldn’t have to always wonder “what if?”
And now she is my wife.
I think the problem with many of the guys in the Church today (I count myself one of these before I finally put myself out there three years ago today) is that they befriend many girls, have many deep conversations, but never, ever put themselves in such a vulnerable position as to allow the girl to know their true intentions. And if they have no intentions then they should leave the girl alone. There has been many a trail of tears following guys with vague motives and ambiguous actions that are inconsistent and don’t correspond with their words.
Telling Susan I was crazy about her seemed counter intuitive and foolish. But now, looking back three years after the fact, I could not imagine my life if I had not told her how I felt. I am thankful that I was not cast headlong and even more so that she gave me a chance.
Therefore, I tell all you guys who sit on the proverbially fence, “go for it.” I am not saying it will necessarily work out. It very well might not work out. I am just saying be honest. At least you will know. And she will too. And you never know what could happen from there.